Disbelief

There are no words.

Tonight, as Matt and I enjoyed dinner with some of his players, I learned of the suicide of one of my former students.

I don't even know what to say.  I can't even get my thoughts straight.  The tears just keep coming.

My heart hurts. Ouch. 

It hurts for T, for whatever it was that he was facing was clearly a beast.

It hurts for his friends, for he had so many.  Kids this young should not be facing something this heavy.  This real.  This...final.

It hurts for his family.  I don't know if he had brothers and sisters.  I'm not even sure which high school he was attending.  But oh, his poor parents.  His poor mom.

Stuff like this just hits me so much harder since having Carter.  I can't handle thinking that some child, someones child, was hurting so much that THIS is how he chose to end his pain.

Ouch.