Game day baby!!

Dear Daddy,

I can't wait to go to my first football game today.  You have been telling me all about it for what seems like forever now!  When I was in Mama's belly you would tell me about all the different teams we were going to face and talked me through some plays.  This summer you taught me all about the 3-4 defense and all the positions on the field.  And now tonight I get to see it all in person!  I can't wait!

Mama has my outfit all picked out.  She keeps telling me not to grow so I can fit into everything.  I don't understand how I'm supposed to stop growing?!?

Good luck, Daddy!  I'll be cheering for you in the stands!  If you see me with my eyes closed it's just because I'm praying to the football gods, not napping.  I promise.

Love you,
Carter

And for Uncle Jeff

Disbelief

There are no words.

Tonight, as Matt and I enjoyed dinner with some of his players, I learned of the suicide of one of my former students.

I don't even know what to say.  I can't even get my thoughts straight.  The tears just keep coming.

My heart hurts. Ouch. 

It hurts for T, for whatever it was that he was facing was clearly a beast.

It hurts for his friends, for he had so many.  Kids this young should not be facing something this heavy.  This real.  This...final.

It hurts for his family.  I don't know if he had brothers and sisters.  I'm not even sure which high school he was attending.  But oh, his poor parents.  His poor mom.

Stuff like this just hits me so much harder since having Carter.  I can't handle thinking that some child, someones child, was hurting so much that THIS is how he chose to end his pain.

Ouch.

Football season is like childbirth...

You quickly forget as soon as it's over how long, painful and lonely it is.  I'm so thankful God wipes these bitter feelings from me each December so I can gear up to do it all over again every year (football...not childbirth.)

These past 2 weeks have been hard.  Matt's been working 16 hour days and Carter's all over the place trying to get on a schedule.  We've had more good days than bad ones, but the bad days are bad.  Thankfully his night sleep is still going strong.  When Matt gets home (if I'm still awake) all he wants to do is eat and crash whereas I want to finally have some adult interaction.  This whole stay at home gig is hard, much harder than I thought it would be.  And lonely.  I'm sure Cooper and Carter are tired of hearing me babble to them all day, lol.

We are trying to learn to honor each others needs; Matt's need to "decompress" when he walks in for a few minutes and my need to connect to him and the real world.  Matt has some extra stress this year with having his own classroom and being DC and I can only imagine the overload his brain is feeling this first week of school.

But I'm still really excited.  I can't wait to take Carter to his first game and cheer on Matt and our Tigers from the stands.  As hard and as time consuming as Matt's job is it's also so much fun.  Who else can say they have 5,000+ people come to their job site and cheer them on each week?  I'm so proud of the work he is doing with these boys and this school.  And I remind myself of that each night when I'm eating dinner by myself.

And here's an obligatory pic of C so this post isn't too boring.  We definitely have ourselves a stomach sleeper.

God is SO good!

Please head over to my friend, Amanda's, blog and wish her a BIG congrats!!

So happy for you, Amanda! (and Brian!)

First Day of School

source

Honestly, I thought this transition to stay home with Carter would be super easy, but it has surprisingly thrown me for a loop.  I found myself wishing I was at school today greeting kids, planning lessons and enjoying lunch with my teacher friends.  I'm hoping that once this first week of school is over I will be 100% at peace with my decision to stay home and chalk up these emotions to nostalgia.  Only time will tell.

Matt left this morning at 5:45 and came home after 9:00.  I forget how lonely football season is.

I came home from the grocery store today right when the elementary school in our neighborhood was releasing.  There were parents, kids, bikes, wagons and dogs everywhere...it was too cute!  I cried thinking of Carter having his first day of school in 5 years (one of the two times I cried today.)

Today was the first time in the last 24 years that I haven't been going to my own first day of school.  

Today my very first group of 7th graders start their freshmen year of college.  

Today I started college 10 years ago.  10 years.  I remember my first class was psychology and I made a friend sitting outside the building because we were both wearing our Tri Delt pledge jerseys.  It's funny...the random, most insignificant things you remember.

To celebrate today I went and got a manicure.  Red!  4 days to kick-off! 

Weekend

Our weekend was super low-key.  Matt worked Saturday and Sunday for part of the day and I just hung around the house getting a few housekeeping things taken care of.

Brooks was with me most of the day on Saturday.  To be honest, I was a little worried about taking care of 2 kids by myself, but it went really well! I kinda feel like Superwoman! It helps that Carter had the best day yet (and took 4 naps!)

We watched a little Caillou...okay, a lot of Caillou

Took some naps

I even managed breakfast and lunch for me and Brooks, and did 2 loads of laundry!

When Uncle Matty came home it was time for a little of this...I melt. 

And just so he's not overshadowed, here's a pic of my happy (redheaded?!?) baby

Our Week in iPhone Pictures

Sunday:

 Napping during the rainy morning

Hanging out with Aunt Lala after my first trip to church

Monday:

Judge me by my size, do you?

Tuesday:

 My last newborn outfit (clearly I'm having trouble accepting that he is big enough for 0-3 clothes)

Being silly 

Wednesday:

I just slept 8 hours!

Thursday:

 "See mom, I look so much cuter when my clothes actually fit me."

 Visiting Sophie and Auntie Sara

FaceTiming with Nana and PawPaw

Friday:

 Helping Daddy in his classroom

 Laughing instead of napping

Trying to charm Mama with my smile so I don't have to go to bed

8 Hours

Guess who just slept 8 hours straight...

THIS GUY!!!

-No, this is not normal.  And by posting this I'm sure I'm jinxing any nights he might try to do this again in the future.

- He actually slept 8 hours 15 minutes before I woke him up.  I was at the ohmygoodnessheneedtoeat NOW place. 

- I wonder how much longer he would have slept if I let him?

-He ate for about 20 minutes and went right back to sleep and slept an additional 4 hours before I woke him up again.  

-I'm thinking he was SO tired from crying all day yesterday that he was just plain exhausted and this is not the start of a new trend.  Yes, it was that bad.
-Who thinks he is going to sleep awful tonight? *raises hand*

Town Pep Rally

Yay, football season!!

We officially kicked off football season at KHS last night with the annual town pep rally. This year was SUPER special because 1) Carter...duh, and 2) Brooks danced with the cheerleaders! You are supposed to be 4 before you can do dance-n-cheer but Henson gave us the hook up ;)

Matt was introduced as the Defensive Coordinator (yay!) and he got to introduce his linebackers to the crowd.  I'm sure he was nervous talking on the mic but he did great.

Carter got LOTS of love from everyone there...I don't think I held him the entire night.  If this is what football season is like I might have to start fighting for my kid, lol!

Such a fun night! Go Tigers!